Will you Will?

The last couple of weeks have been heavy. Sure they have had some totally awesome and lively and lovely moments...I am not discounting that in the slightest. However, sometimes there are heavy moments. Three weeks ago I attended a funeral for two of my friends' father. It was an incredible celebration of life. I won't go into great details here but it was amazing to see how much energy this man put into his life. He was vibrant and vital and passionate and just...full of life. Each photo captured his essence. I had never ever met him and yet I felt that I got to know him over the course of this celebration of life. I did the best that I could to help my friends and their family make it through the day and handle their grief.

 As I was driving home...I was moved to tears. The same questions passed through my mind after a funeral...who would attend my funeral if I were to die tomorrow? Did I live my life to the best of my ability? Did I share my gifts with others? Did I make an impact? Did I love? Did I matter? Did I make someone else's life better by being in it? Did I make amends? These thoughts stayed with me. Inspiring me to look for ways that I could do more. Less than 10 days later my beloved Great Aunt passed away. This lead to further reflection. Are my affairs in order? Will I be leaving my loved ones with a huge headache to deal with? Do people know what my wishes are? Do they understand how I would like to be remembered? Would they know to donate my organs if that option is available?  How would my eulogy read? What would my epitaph say? All of these questions weigh on my mind these days.

I speak to everyone who will listen to me about death. Not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything like that. Death does not scare me. In fact it is not even people's greatest fear in life...Public speaking is. Death is just part of the cycle. And depending on your beliefs it could lead to great reward. Or a chance to live again.

In talking with people I did find that people are afraid to write a will.  Like it would somehow symbolize that they are not immortal.  That the grim reaper will add them to the list once the will is registered.  But that is not the case.  The life and death cycle will become complete when it is our time.  So take the time while you still have time to put your affairs in order.  To ensure that those you leave behind are not having to deal with the added pressure of figuring out what you want for your life celebration.  So that they are not having to try and make decisions on your behalf when you are not around to answer the questions.  And if they cannot reach a decision they will have to rely on the courts to do so...is that really what you would want?

What I have found is that people do not want to face death alone.  We like the support of those we love to be with us.  To help get us through.  So I thought...what is the best way that we could help make writing wills easier, less intimidating, less fearful.  And this is the solution I came up with....

We are going to have a will party. We will dress like zombies and angels, and reapers and goblins or whatever our hearts desire. And we will invite our friends. We will "will" and then after we will celebrate with one another. Perhaps even share our fondest memories of each other. What we will always remember about each other. Share stories of how we touched each others lives. And we will sleep well knowing that when the end comes...our families will have a road map to follow.

Now not everyone will agree with me.  Some of you may think that this should be done in private.  And that is perfectly acceptable.  What I do encourage you to do...is to write a will.  Alone, with people, wearing purple pajamas...how ever you want to but be sure to write a will.  In the end when you are gone it will do nothing for you but it will be a great relief to those who you leave behind.

Much Love,

Lisa

Ps:  I promise that tomorrow Day Six of #31DBC will be of a much more uplifting topic.